The Wheel and Axle

Just because I’m in the mood and am tired of having to debunk various moronic statements every time the topic comes up, let me shoot down the common arguments of anti-gay and anti-same sex marriage simpletons.

This way, I don’t have to repeat myself; I can just point them in this direction.

1. “It’s not natural.” The animal kingdom is full of species that have documented homosexual behavior. But obviously, we shouldn’t let science and facts get in the way of our preconceived prejudices.

2. “What next? Pedophilia? Bestiality?” Normally, I would ignore such an outrageous and moronic claim, but I’ll play. The problem with comparing pedophilia and zoophilia (which may lead to bestiality) to homosexuality is that the former are psychiatric disorders while the latter is not, as per the APA’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (what? again with experts in science?).

Moreover, the issue with the pedophilia and bestiality revolves around the concept of consent. A child – someone who lacks maturity and sufficient mental development – cannot truly consent, especially in the context of an adult who may be pressuring him or her. An animal cannot consent, either, unless you can prove this by having your bulldog sign a form.

You know what happens without consent? Rape.

Homosexuality is vastly different as long as the parties involved are consensual. To compare this to pedophilia and bestiality is grossly ignorant and downright despicable.

3. “It’s against God! It’s a sin.” Not everyone is Christian or Muslim or what-have-you. Get over it. Never use this argument because the world does not revolve around your religion and your beliefs, and there are those who think you’re crazy.

Also, if you’re a Christian and have actually read the Bible, you would know that Jesus never spoke of homosexuality, but He did have a lot of nasty words to say about religious hypocrites who held disdain for social outcasts.

4. “It’s against the Bible!” For sensible true Christian believers like me, the Bible is meant to be a spiritual guide for truth, not an instruction manual. Otherwise, I would not be eating bacon (sacrilege!) nor would I wear mixed fabrics. Leviticus also had a pretty wide array of bizarre laws involving marriage and sex, by the way, so best of luck using that as your basis for your bigotry arguments. You really must stop picking and choosing what suits your agenda.

And of course, for non-believers, well, they don’t give a shit if you use this argument. Stop forcing this on them because you’re just blabbing uselessly.

5. “Same-sex marriage will cause the population to decline!” Are you an idiot? Because if you really think like this, then you are. Allowing same sex marriage will not magically cause heterosexuals to stop having sex nor cause them to mysteriously turn gay. Heterosexuals will still be able to freely overpopulate the planet if they wanted to, and in fact, heterosexuals continue to do so.

6. “Same-sex marriage will destroy ‘traditional’ marriage.” Similar to #5, allowing same-sex marriage will not magically stop the heteros from marrying each other. Straights will still be free to marry and then divorce as often as they want to; we’re just giving the LGBT community the same rights to engage in the same possible misery.

7. “Same-sex marriage will destroy families.” There have been a lot of LGBT couples who have raised families. They have also adopted children who otherwise might not even experience growing up in a family. On the flipside, while many heterosexual marriages are successful, many are also broken. It seems to me that family destruction does not depend on sexual orientation but rather on personal conflicts.

8. “The purpose of marriage is to procreate!” All right, then let’s make a law that will ban infertile people from marrying. And married women who go into menopause? They will need to be forced into divorce while we find fresh young women for their older but still virile husbands to impregnate.

See how stupid that argument is?

9. “Marriage is a traditional, religious institution that cannot be co-opted by you heathens.” How about educating yourself and reading up, for starters? Newsflash: marriage as an institution started thousands of years ago as a social contract that allowed men to keep women as their properties. Lovely start, wasn’t it? It was only co-opted by religion (as well as hopeless romantics) later on.

This is why we also have civil, non-church weddings. Otherwise, you should also be rallying against atheists who are choosing to get married in city hall.

Same-sex marriage proponents are not seeking to be married in church (though some churches are open to and allow it). They are seeking to be given civil rights – the right to be married under the law and at the same time enjoy the same equal benefits as any married couple.

10. “I’m a bigot who find it gross.” At least you’re honest, and I can probably respect you a teensy bit more than someone who uses any of the “arguments” above.

Well, just a teensy bit.

Because you’re still a bigot.