The Wheel and Axle

That moment you check your public page and see that it’s been invaded by the intellectually-challenged and the humor-deficient.

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I won’t lie and say that there are no closet cases that irritate me. I’m not perfect, and there are certain types I hold in disdain. They fall into two categories:

• The closet cases who compensate for it by being homophobic and are assholes towards other gay people. These closet cases, in my opinion, deserve a lot of rightful shaming for being vile hypocrites.
• The closet cases who use unsuspecting women as beards in order to give off the illusion that they are straight. Often, this type of relationship results in major pain for the woman involved, and in some cases, can also lead to abuse. (I’m 50/50 on closet cases who date women who know the truth and are willing parties in order to help cover up for the guy; I guess that depends on the situation.)

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So I came across this article today, and apparently it also slightly trended.

“Flys.” Really?

(I won’t even mention how she misspelled “Philippines.” Oh, wait, I just did.)

Karlie Kloss is the reason why models are stereotyped as stupid. Now obviously not all of them are, quite a number are actually pretty smart, but she certainly just came out as the poster girl of the typecast.

What makes it worse is that, in this case, she was completely at fault: arriving late for a flight and expecting special treatment.

PAL is not perfect and can be frustrating. In fact, its only advantage in the Philippines is that its competitions are Cebu Pacific and AirAsia, making it seem five star in comparison – which is not a compliment. I was in Jakarta a few weeks back, and getting in touch with them to rebook was hell, especially since they don’t have any international hotlines except for the USA.

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For the record, to address some insinuations of the grossly misinformed, no. I don’t support Tito Sotto and his politics just because he is associated with Eat Bulaga.

Why? Because I’m educated and smart enough to distinguish and separate his showbiz associations from his political affiliations and beliefs.

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Originally published on my Facebook account last 13 October 2015.

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Mga kababayan,

Kasalukuyan po akong naghahanap ng running mate para maging Bise Presidente ko. Sya ang makakaakibat ko upang isulong ang adbokasya ko ukol sa China, kung saan papalakasin natin ang diplomatic ties sa Saturn at Jupiter para makatulong sa ating Hukbong Sandatahan. Gagawa kami ng VAA (Visiting Aliens Agreement).

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Just in case you happened to pass by, curious and wondering if I were in contact with aliens from outer space and if I had an embassy set up on the planet Tatooine.

I am, however, willing to open up diplomatic relations with the Klingons for so long as you promise to get me enough energon cubes from Cybertron.

Me.

Crazy Alien Guy.

It’s funny how some people are now trying to defend “It’s Showtime” because it’s probably finally realized it’s been beaten. Or rather, finally admitted it… because the show and the network have been in a state of denial.

“Why are people bashing Showtime?” the pretending-to-be-oblivious rabid Showtime fans ask. (I say “rabid” as there surely are some fans who are level-headed, and I myself do not deny watching some of its old features, like Pogay.)

“Why can’t they leave Showtime alone?” these mouth-frothers whine. “Vice says they were never trying to beat Eat Bulaga.” As though they had not been on social media for the last few months and had not seen exactly what had happened.

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Dear Polo Ravales,

Ateneo at UP Diliman graduate ako. Mataas na ang sweldo ko sa call center. Matagal na nitong nabawi ang tuition ko, including Masteral units. Nakakatulong na ako sa magulang ko, nakakapagbakasyon en grande pa ako kasama ang mga kaibigan ko sa kung saan-saang lugar dito sa Pilipinas at sa ibang bansa.

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Recently, I watched Lav Diaz’s Norte, Hangganan ng Kasaysayan. Actually, I was able to watch it twice, the four-hour running time notwithstanding. It was a pretty amazing experience, a Filipino movie so good it’s rare. Very rare. It’s been chosen as our entry for the Oscars this year, and here’s hoping it makes it to the final list of nominees at least. It has won a lot of awards and rave reviews internationally, and the crowning glory would be a much-covered Academy Award.

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